Crafting subverses: A narrative analysis of the experience of losing a parent through intimate partner homicide

Purpose: Losing a parent due to intimate partner homicide is a traumatic experience, exacerbated by homicide and the associated grief being a taboo in many western cultures. This study investigated the experiences of young people and adults bereaved by parental intimate partner homicide during childhood, to gain a better understanding of how they make sense of and share their personal story after such a loss.
Methods: Within the context of a larger study, we conducted twelve semi-structured interviews with people with lived experience of such deaths in Australia and used narrative analysis to interpret the data.
Results: Participants were frequently confronted with imposed narratives (i.e., from family, practitioners, peers) about the homicide, their parents, and their own identities, leading to a deep sense of loneliness and feeling misunderstood, powerless, and silenced. In various ways, participants resisted imposed narratives and took control over their stories. This process was difficult but could lead to improved and more authentic relationships with oneself, family, and others. In this way, participants used their experiences to transform themselves and others, sometimes by becoming advocates or practitioners supporting others with similar experiences.
Conclusions: We named this process of taking control of one’s story “crafting subverses.” It involved making sense of and sharing experiences of trauma and grief for personal healing and social justice. Helping children craft their “subverses” may be an important aspect of gaining a deeper understanding of how to support them. Provision of carefully tailored peer mentoring, professional support and opportunities to influence programs and policy appear key to better support systems for those bereaved due to parental intimate partner homicide.