“It’s quite difficult to put autistic relationships in a box”: A qualitative exploration of romantic relationships in gender and sexually-diverse Autistic adults

Autistic people enjoy friendships, sexual and romantic relationships. Many Autistic people are also part of a gender or sexual minority, yet gender and sexual minorities are often under-represented in autism research. The current study asked ‘How do gender and sexually-diverse Autistic adults experience and perceive romantic relationships?’. Sixteen gender and/or sexual minority Autistic adults took part in semi-structured interviews. Interviews were transcribed and analysed using thematic analysis. Four main themes were identified from the interview data: 1) “It’s Quite Difficult to Put Autistic Relationships Into a Box”, 2) Challenging Social Norms, 3) The Perks and Perils of Online Dating and 4) Understanding and Neurotype. Overall, participants described their relationships as individual, inherently valuable, and shaped by unique preferences, mutual understanding, and explicit communication. They also emphasized the fluidity between friendships and romantic partnerships, the importance of mutual understanding, and the inherent value of rejecting prescriptive social norms in favour of individualised romantic relationship dynamics. These findings highlight relationship structures in Autistic groups who identify as gender and/or sexual minority.